Showing posts with label Being. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Being. Show all posts

Sunday, December 12, 2010

I've Been Dumped - Now What? Your Way Out of The "Being Dumped" Hole

I've been dumped by my boyfriend. What to do now? My reaction to this situation might differ from yours. Some people might find things easy and they are immediately on their ways to move on and forget about the breakup. Some people might suffer but with a good plan and practicing control over their emotions they can finally survive. Some people might find the breakup experience as a permanent nightmare they can't get rid of.

That depends on many factors. Some of them are psychological readiness and the intensity of emotions and love. From one point of view it is a waste of your time to spend it mourning and feeling sorry because you have been dumped. Some people might say that these are natural human feelings that need to be exhausted.

Anyway you need a good plan to get rid of the "Being dumped" feeling and that is what we are going to discuss here.

What you have to do now is the direct opposite of what you feel you want to do. If you feel the urge to call your ex then it is better for you to keep the no contact with him for several weeks. Your ex might now want to experience his new freedom and he will start doing things he wasn't doing while you were with him. After that period of new experiencing flashes out then he might miss you and all the good things you represented in his life. Curiosity might be another factor if you spent a long period of time without contact. He might ask himself why you are not calling or contacting.

If you feel the urge to sit down in your house and be alone all the time then you have to do the exact opposite thing. Go out to new places and meet new people. Gather your friends for a feast or hang out with them in places you have never visited. The fresh air and the new overwhelming experiences and feelings will prevent you from thinking about the past. This is really the cure for your loneliness and depression.

To sum it up you have to gain the momentum in your life and do not waste any other minute crying on your ex or reminiscing about the good old days. Live your day with its new challenges and surprises. Meet new people and experiences, go to new places.

Remember that when your ex boyfriend sees that you still miss him and want him back he will not realize this is a sign of love and passion. Boys almost always see that as a sign of weakness and despair. You do not want to compromise your image in your ex's eyes with these weak and pathetic behaviors.

Monday, November 22, 2010

4 Tips For Dating After Being Divorced

Dating after being divorced is tough. You have to learn how to speak to woman again and you have to learn the ropes of dating also. It's not hard to do, but it can be a little tough especially if you're not good with women. So if this is your scenario, then this article is for you. In this article we will take a look at some tips that you can use to get back into the dating game simply and easily. Here's tip number 1.

1) Don't have high expectations

The one thing that you don't want to do is look at the next woman that you date as someone that can be your next wife. Take things slow and don't expect too much from your next relationship. You're just fresh from getting married so more than likely you will want some space to play around in. This is normal, and you should take your time while you do so.

2) Boost your confidence level

Your confidence may be shattered because you've just been through a tough divorce, but that shouldn't deter you from trying again. The best thing that you can do right now is to go into a mirror and look at yourself. This is the actual technique that you will do, and you need to use a mirror to do.

You want to use a mirror because acting out in a certain way will seem unfamiliar to you, so you need to learn how to be comfortable with yourself. This will allow you to boost your confidence because as your practice in the mirror, you will be "getting over yourself" and will come to terms to who you are as an individual.

3) Find a compatible mate

Even though you've gotten out of a relationship with your ex-wife, you can still find some qualities of her that you liked to help find your next mate. However along with that, you need to take the negatives and use that as a guide to find your next partner. The bottom line is that you and your ex broke up for a reason, and you don't want to find someone who has the same bad qualities as the same problems will creep up again.

Be wise in your decision when finding your next girlfriend as you don't want to repeat the problems of the past.

4) Be prepared for inadequacy

Sometimes you will compare some parts of your new date with your ex to see who is better and sometimes you will find that your ex wife is better in some reasons. This is normal. You need to take the good things of your next date to better yourself as a person.

The reason your marriage failed wasn't all your ex's fault. You inevitably played a role in the ending of your marriage, so you should take a look at how you could have been a better man to your ex. You will want to take this experience as a learning curve for the next relationship that you're in.

All of these 4 tips will allow you to get back into the dating game. It will take some time for you to get back into it slowly, but once your back into it everything should be fine. Good luck on your efforts of getting back into the dating game.

Friday, November 19, 2010

Being Single Post Divorce

Did you wake up one day single after a brutal divorce? What the hell do I do now, you may be asking yourself. A moment please: I have fantastic news here. If you think about it, you can now create any type of life you want: you are in control and can build a fantastic life for yourself. Like it's a new beginnings for your life.

Grasping this will become so important. You will inherit a hug block of time, now, despite your responsibilities. Now, whether that's good or bad, it's entirely up to you.
Here are simple ways of getting your life back on track for the man who is just recently (or not) made single after divorce.

What you have to do is build a cool life-style.

What the heck am I saying here? Understanding the fact that you now possess something valued: freedom. Incredible things can happen with that personal freedom. Taking a minute to pause and think about it:

-Having astonishing encounters with new and amazing women.

-For you, meeting new and dynamic people.

-You will have all sorts of new adventures in your life.

-You can pursue all of those things you were wanting to, but couldn't because you were stuck in that marriage.... but the only way this is going to happen is for you to take positive action by deciding to do so.

Focus Your Life On What You Want--Then Go For It!

Since you have gone through the divorce and that you are single again, you can steer your life where you want it to go. As a man that has gone through a divorce, the one thing that I wanted to do was to have choice with women so as to make the right decision when the next time to marry arose.

I did think about this for some time. With all the women I was with--and especially the ones that didn't work out--I was the constant. I had to realize that no matter whose fault it was in the end, I had to take 100% full responsibility so that I could move forward with my life. With that, I had in my mind to get myself and my life in order. So I worked on my self esteem, life-style, and my ability to attract women to me.

Now, that was me. Everyone's destination can be different; that's OK. If you can get this "women" thing mastered, it is my strong belief, through experience, that all other facets of your life will fall into place. For sure, you can pursue something else if you would like: they all are just different paths leading to the top of the mountain. Move everything about you toward what YOU want, and move your life in that direction. Let that purpose or goal define your life. This will be the your new focus of attention.
Some cool examples:

-Mastering once and for all, women, dating, and relationships.

-Work on becoming a musician.

-Become a captain of a small ship like a yacht. -Get an avid interest in biking.

-Travel the world.

-Participate in a physical sport like soccer or baseball; maybe a non-physical one like fishing.

-Get healthy and become a long distance runner and train for a marathon.

What I am trying to show you here is that if you focus on something you have passion for, it will refocus your energy on something other than feeling sorry for yourself and the fact that you are single after a divorce.

Indeed, it would be a bad thing if you made the divorce and everything about it, the focus of your attention. Divorce for so many men can mean "failure," which it is not. It can wreak havoc in your life.

That low self-esteem that follows can become extremely toxic. That's one of the primary reason that divorced men become alcoholics.

If that happens to you, it is just unhealthy. By contrast, put the focus of your attention on something infinitely more constructive like what you are passionate about. Let your mind attract itself to something positive.

Wonderfully, whatever you pursue, it will only help you gain more masculine power.

In a way, it's a great adventure of finding "yourself." The main benefit of this is that you will start to attract women by default, because you don't have your "heart on your sleeve" and that you have a life-style you have built from the ground up. It is important to note here not to ever make the woman more important than the life you are about to create.

As you can see the importance of building a new lifestyle. If you follow this, genuinely, divorce can be extremely liberating. By following your passion, you can survive this difficult time.

Moreover, in the near distant future, you will actually be looking back at this time as a period of positive growth.