Most women cannot fathom what a man newly divorced goes through after a divorce. The anguish and pain can sometimes be unbearable. As if a battered self-image was punishment enough, the financial cost of the divorce can leave you with a feeling that would crush any "stand up" guy. Moreover, we are not even talking about the often nasty custody battle that many times is the final "nail" in the coffin of loneliness that often follows a divorce.
Well, there's a couple of things here that are vital that you understand in order to get yourself on your feet again and actively taking the path towards your own crafted new happy life, filled with beautiful and exciting women! Let's get rid of this loneliness business for the divorced man, once and for all.
Work On Your Self-Esteem
First and foremost, when we look at divorced men and loneliness, you will find that your self-esteem will be on the low side. It is vital to bring your self-image and self-esteem up to speed. Low self -esteem will create loneliness. Too, not only is that bad for your mental health, but it will kill your game with women.
One thing first: there is nothing wrong with you. What you are feeling is perfectly normal and ok.
I don't care who has told you that you "had a good thing with your "ex." Screw that. You are going to get what you want from your life this time around!
But, people will make you feel like it was your fault. I think that was one of the things I hated so much about my divorce. It's not rocket science: people change or just grow apart. It happens. Most of the time, the two never should have gotten married in the first place. It's not as bad as you would think. Enlighten that chatterbox in your head that it's going to be ok.
Just remember this: whatever doesn't kill you will only make you stronger!
I like calling it being a "he-man" about it and not be a wimp. I know it's painful, but you are going to have to be a man and own up to your responsibilities to yourself. I thought this was crazy at the time, but all of that pain you are suffering is actually going to help you over time. It's like the old saying: whatever doesn't kill you will only make you stronger. Know, that in time, that pain is going to recede.
Courage is the cure to the pain that divorce brings.
Courage: Have It Fuel You Decisions To Give You Everything You Deserve!
Hence the solution: courage. Courage is having to do the right thing, even though you are not certain of the outcome; it takes a little faith--faith in yourself. You have to make the decision that you deserve to be happy. Moreover, you need to make a decision to actively get out there and meet women.
A great saying is this, "A new nail drives out an old one. " Remember that when you might miss your ex.
The solution to loneliness is to find a new women in your life. That should be your new goal and focus of attention. It will at the least keep you from a self-pity situation which is not good for your mental health.
Onwards.
A decision is a solitary thing you must do on your own. But, with courage you can do it. (Know that after you make a decision, that people out of nowhere will come to help you achieve what you've decided to do, like me!)
Now that you understand these two important elements, it's time for the last important component...
The Fork In The Road
Look, there's another saying you have to understand and use, and that is this: If you are at a fork in the road, take it!
No question about it, this is important to comprehend. What this means is that you actively have to get yourself out there to end loneliness in your post divorced life. Get yourself out into the social scene and meet women! Don't get confused or depressed and stay home and mope: that's staying at the "fork."
My other posts will talk about social circle as a powerful way to meet women, but you need to go to social events. When your friends tell you that they are having a party or they are going out for dinner with friends, that's what I am talking about. Just get the hell out there and take that fork in the road.
Or, you can go out to the coffee house and start a "chat" with a woman you see and are attracted to. Speed dating would be great too. Sign up with a buddy and have some fun. Or, you can hang out with your friends that are women and go out with them. No friends that are women? Make them. Go out and take that "fork in the road!"
If you take these three important tips, women will fill your life, and you will even forget that you felt sad and that you were even dealing with loneliness at all!
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