Why Is Moving on From Divorce So Hard for Men?

Men find moving on from divorce to be an incredibly difficult task. A statement that might cause some debate, but time and again studies have shown men being more prone to health issue both physical and mental after a divorce than women with an increase in the rate of depression, anxiety, sickness and of course - suicide. This is not to diminish the pain a woman must suffer as well of course, but the statistics show they do indeed cope better than men.

So why is it that men find it difficult to move on and start life afresh once their marriage is over? Is it society, genetics, the law? This article will look at a few reasons why men have a rough time after divorce.

1. Not Asking For Help

Men are our own worst enemies sometimes. We see everything as a problem to be fixed, a nail that needs hammering that we will do on our own. We all like to think of ourselves as independent problem solvers. However how many of usually do call the plumber when the situation goes beyond your knowledge? How many of you actually know how to really fix a car engine? Some of us are experts at these things, most are not. Your mind is an engine that you probably don't know enough about to mend on your own DIY style and you suffer more the less help you get.

2. Less Helpful Resources

Women usually have a better social network to help them cope with divorce, but there are also many more agencies out there specialising in helping women recover form trauma of all sorts. This is wonderful and needed, but men have only a fraction of these sorts of resources both socially and professionally. The lack of support and the lack of knowledge of support can hurt means chances of overcoming divorce pain.

3. Feelings of Being Judged

Some men might want to seek help, but feel if they do they will be judges as weak by other men and woman too. Trying to fill the stoic male role has hurt more men than you realise who needed mental health help but were too scared to seek it.

4. Loss of Identity

This is a big issue I believe. Both sexes tie their identity to their marriage, but I feel that men often (but not always) tie who they are to their marriage more strongly than a woman does. Perhaps this is because women no longer have society telling them to be a perfect wife and instead get a career and a life and so forth. Men though are often pushed to feel they should always be better husbands and start to identify that as who they are. Just as their job often defines much more about them and if they lose that, they feel less of a man as a similar example.