Everyone experiences joy and sorrow in their lives at some point and for many more than once. However this does not help you much when your heart is breaking. The good news is that as others have been through it and come out the other side, so will you. In the meantime, you had hopes and dreams together that have now been dashed, all you can think of is "she broke my heart, how will I ever love again," and you feel like it is the end of your world.
These feelings can be all engulfing and may cause some confusion - there are lots of feelings swirling around including feelings of hurt and pain, as well as a sense of loss and more intense grieving. Some people can be quite puzzled by how they are feeling, but bear in mind it is as if something has died, and it has. You had a dream of building a life with your partner and you had built a different lifestyle with her and that has now been taken away. It is normal and natural to feel grief over this.
Finding out that this grief is understandable in this circumstance can provide a sense of relief. Knowing that this phase of getting over a breakup is normal, and the main point is that it is a phase, and as such it will pass, can give a glimmer of hope to a heart-broken man in a dark place.
The extent of the pain you feel is a measure of how much you were into your girlfriend and how serious your relationship was when she left. Immediately after the breakup you may feel like your heart is breaking and will never mend. It feels so bad that you can physically experience pain in your chest, and you feel like it will never be okay again, and as bad as it feels this is a normal reaction for anyone who has a broken heart.
Over time you will notice that the intensity of feelings will lessen and you will begin to feel more like yourself again. Be aware that there may be periods of relapse where you plummet to the depths of despair from time to time but these should lessen in length of time and in frequency.
Others around you cannot fully comprehend what this breakup means to you and how deeply affected you have been by it. When your heart has been broken by the woman you love, it can leave lasting scars and it is something that you will never forget.
As mentioned before there can be physical feelings as a result of the breakup, and also there are psychological symptoms to be aware of. As you progress through recovering from a breakup you can experience some or all of these, but not necessarily will:
? Difficulty eating
? Difficulty sleeping
? Tightness or pain in the chest due to anxiety
? Nausea
? Tiredness
? Lower self-respect and/or self-esteem
? Feelings of despair and hopelessness
These symptoms can range from mild to severe in different individuals, and any symptoms that persist or become more severe, seek medical help immediately to rule out any other underlying causes.
Just knowing what you are feeling is normal and will eventually subside, can help you work through your recovery with the hope of falling in love again eventually. As time passes you will begin to regain interest in the things in your life and this is also a good time to touch base with your family and friends and allow them to provide you with support and comfort.
Offering help to others will help put life into perspective for you, when you see that there are also others who have major problems. It will give you a different focus and take your mind off your troubles for a while.
Even though you are grieving now, you will heal and come to accept that this part of your life is over, and as you let your ex go, be gentle with yourself and forgive the things you may have done that contributed to the break-down in your relationship. Take the time to learn more about yourself and increase your experience in relationship building so that the next relationship you start will benefit from what you have learned.
Even as you are still crying inside, "she broke my heart," and it feels so bad right now, know that as for any wound it will heal, and you will be a better person for the experience if you allow yourself to become better through it and not bitter. Each day that passes will bring a little more light and peace and as you heal, your breakup will become a faded memory eventually. You may always love your ex but you will know you are healed when you can remember her warmly without the painful feelings, and you are looking forward to a new love again in your life.
No comments:
Post a Comment